Tachikawa NO JIRETTAI BURO-GU!

I’m officially 19. Yes. The big one-nine. I’m sitting here partly drunk typing on my blog. I’ll type out my birthday experiences tomorrow, when I’m more coherent, ; - ; .

My shout outs go to all my homies in the hooood. … or not. The only hood I have is the hood on the back of my jacket. Heh. Peeps like Grace, Hans, Naf, Fir, Hiroko, Adan, Chaboom, Val, Thomas, Zokie, Ace. everyone. Thanks guys. You da bombs! Peace~

P.S. Grace I really appreciate the thing you gave me. Its so personal and so..touching. Read through the whole thing. Brought me through all the times. Its so…life-story-ish. The best present ever. Thanks! *hugs*~ Oh and Hans and your funky shirt. Thanks man! Appreciate it Oh and Naf, your moving PEP talk. I think I’m gonna go all out man! Thanks dude. And Fir and Chaboom, thanks for coming ya? ^ - ^

Nite~ Will continue tomorrow. Freakin tired man. Ahhh. Bed. Aircon. House music. ahhhh~

Just a little weird for my taste, that’s all. It’s interesting how some dreams tend to just be forgotten quick succession, but not this particular dream. どうしてかな？I’ve tried to really forget about her; this girl that had been plaguing my mind for a long time. I managed to forget, for some time, heck, for quite a long time, but it hasn’t been easy. Its easier, in theory, to just ignore it rather than to forget, and that’s what most of us do in order to get on with our lives, and that is what I think I had been doing for the past few months. Its really pathetic how I’ve been doing this, it really is, but I guess the sub-conscious mind is a really strong thing for most of us that we tend to really underestimate its endless possibilities, I guess. Enough rambling, I think its time to reveal this really really weird dream I had last night. Do note that I haven’t been reminded of that certain someone for a long time, even if I had been, I didn’t bother much.

Lets start right from the beginning. I went to sleep at around 2 in the morning, which was pretty late by my standards ever since I had been attempting to reset my body’s biological clock in time for the new semester. Then it began. It was one of the most vivid dreams I had ever had in the pas … heck. Ever. It’s really weird. You know how you have been able to remember some dreams, but mostly just turn out to be really vague outlines? You know how you THINK you knew what you dreamt of last night, but when you attempt to recall, you totally CANNOT remember a single thing? Not a single detail. Only if you’re really lucky, maybe, just maybe, a small portion of it, but other than that, mostly just endless nothings. And more nothings. But not this one. Not this dream. It was as vivid as a movie that was playing out in front of you; it was as if you were tight in the thickness of all the going-ons around you. It was really weird. I have never had anything like this in my life at ALL, barring a few incidents back when I was a little kid, nothing. It featured me, right smack in the middle of it. Let me begin:

The venue is a little interesting: Zouk. After the end of a performance of sorts (what I performed, etc. I had no idea, interestingly. It began with the end of my supposed performance.), a group of my friends went backstage to congratulate me on a well-played concert. And then there she was, in all her full glory, as cute as ever, standing there oh-so-innocently with her beautiful eyes looking at me. My heart melted at the sight of her. The above descriptions are totally true to what I remembered so vividly. The whole scene is playing out in my mind as we speak. This is so weird. In the midst of all the noise, she came up to me to personally congratulate me. After a little ‘its been a while’ kinda talk, we exchanged numbers since she lost it. I so wanted to ask her out for a coffee after that but alas, one of you guys in the crowd (you bastard, lol) decided that the whole group should wait outside while I pack up my stuff. I actually said, “Damn!” out loud in my dream mind. As you guys left, I packed my instrument. The instrument once again, I have to say, was really vague. A guitar, an electronic keyboard, who knows. I could only remember a sling bag of sorts.

Once I was ready, I attempted to leave through the front door, but to my horror, it was locked! I had no choice but to leave through the back door. Along the way I saw people closing down the backstage (lights, etc.) and I vividly remember a long-haired girl pulling down some lights on a bar for some purpose (bulb changing, cleaning, adjustment etc. Who knows?) As I continue on further down, I finally came to an exit sign. I pushed the door and I see myself in the corridor of one of them really old HDB blocks (like those old blocks in front of Joo Chiat Complex in Geylang). I was like cursing to myself out loud at this juncture. I continued on and came to this open cemented area, with one of those stone tables and 4 chairs in the middle of it. One thing to take note here was the weather. Apparently I was on some sort of hill and looking down this hill, I could see a forest of sorts. The sky was in an orange-purple hue of sorts, and it was pretty breezy. Nice weather for a dream ya? Heh. So there was this Indian lady sitting down on one of the chairs, and a little toddler, whom I assumed was her grandson.

The ball the toddler was playing with rolled towards me, and I rolled it back to him. I then approached the lady. In a hopeful tone, I asked her if she knew how to get out of the area. She didn’t know. Disappointed, I scouted the edge of the fenced area, looking for a gate, but found none. In a dash of desperation, I climbed over it, and I came to an open HDB carpark. I can once again vividly remember landing beside a garbage disposal building that many old HDB estates have. I continued on walking, and eventually I somehow arrived to the front of Zouk. All of my friends were there, except for her. Yes. She wasn’t there.

Apparently according to them, it was getting too late and she had to go. They also told me that she said she’d call me to apologize and stuff. It was like 4 am, and they had been waiting for me for about 3 hours for me to get out of Zouk. Strangely none of them asked why it took me so long. No one was angry or whatsoever. It was like I came out in 5 minutes; no one noticed the long time period that took me to get out, which was really weird in my opinion.

I was quite disappointed that she had to leave, though I felt happy. Ecstatic more like it, I guess. I felt that at least now I had a chance. A chance to get her. Strangely though, I was actually thinking this when I was at this particular juncture: “At least now the thread has a happy ending. Take that!” I really felt happy. It never ever occurred to me that I was dreaming, at all. It was like ‘this isn’t actually happening to me’ kinda feeling, but I reassured myself that it really WAS happening to me. It WAS reality for me. It really was..

…until I woke up. For once I actually felt really disappointed. I’m not kidding. A sudden wave of disappointment came over me. I was really…wierded out. Well, that’s about the end of it. I don’t understand why, of all times, now. I was NEVER reminded of her; I never thought of her AT ALL for the past few months. It was so sudden and vivid! I really really can’t remember most of the dreams I’ve had. I either wake up happy, sad, or disappointed, without actually REMEMBERING why. Except this time. It was so vivid. Can someone give me an explanation? I’m in serious need of one.

Today has got to be one of the best days of my supposed ‘holiday’man!. The reason why I place as so can be summed up in one word, or more of a short-formed abbreviation: N *bleep*’ TU. Heh, ok, so maybe it wasn’t that bad, but hey, it could have been worse right? (a LOT worse..) *wink*

Alright, now, back to me. Well, why, you may ask? You know how sometimes people say that you should spare some time for yourself, just to distress and relax, without the buzz of the city life? I did just that today. I started out my day well…. how should I say this, hmmm, a little slow? Waking up at 10, a little itsy bitsy piano playin’ here and there, and woops, I fell back down onto my bed and back to slumber land! Again, waking up at 12, a little television here and there and I had to go out for a little religious obligation…and then I was back. Home. Its been a while since I spent time on the internet, you know, keeping the tabs on the latest online fads, jokes, chatting to some of the coolest dudes and dudettes out there (you know who I’m talking ‘bout :D). And I did just that. Till 6 in the evening. Now THAT’S when the fun begins.

Ok, a little check on the present situation. My comrade-in-arms Grace AXP is away in some camp having fun, and since she’s the only person I hang out at the Esplanade with, I had no one to go with on my usual weekly Esplanade outing…sigh.

So off I went, alone. I made a piano room booking with the Esplanade library for around 8 a few hours before hand. Its not like I don’t have a piano at home, but the Esplanade library has just gotta be the best place to hang out you know? They have them cool ambient lighting, just sufficient air-conditioning, lush black leather sofas for you to lounge in, a small pseudo-dancing studio with comfy stools, music listening stations for you to sample the finest collections of classical and contemporary music at your own pleasure, window ledges allowing you to sit down and stare out into the oh-so-funky horizon of the Singapore city skyline and of course!, who can forget the really nice and so aptly-placed piano room, facing the Singapore river! It has just got to be the most inspirational place, well, at least at night, with such a jazzy and funky atmosphere, who can help but to just fall in love with the whole place? But of course, it doesn’t feel the same without Grace around (cue: awwwwww.. heh heh ^ - ^)

So yeah, I played to my heart’s content there, eliciting the usual curious glances I got as to whom was playing such a melodious tune (heh heh, ego check one-two :P) without the aid of any musical notes. I really really really like, no, LOVE, the whole atmosphere. It’s just so amazing! T .o. T Oh well, once it was time to leave, I noticed a small little hip-hop festival happening just in front of the Esplanade, right next to the Singapore River. Now how cool is THAT? A few local hip-hop acts performed, and I had to admit they were pretty good! Them Malay rappers were pretty much waxing lyrical! Finally, the coup de grace, TOO PHAT! This famous rap duo had been doing some really good rapping over the Singapore airwaves and their funky lyrics and stage presence blew the crowd away! Spent an hour there. Great stuff! (Of course who also could not notice them really cute chicks around? ^ - ^)

And now, yeap. I’m here sipping on my Grande Café Latte in Starbucks, with my laptop, on my comfy trademarked Starbucks couch (!!) typing this out. Right out of the movies. You know how you always see them people with their laptops and their cool Starbucks coffee styrofoam cups in the movies? Well, here I am doing a pretty darn well re-enactment of it. Funky! Yeah. 50 mins of blog typing, right in the heart of Starbucks. Life IS beautiful isn’t it? Oh well, its close to 11pm. Think its just about time I leave this place. A perfect end to a perfect day. A little time to myself, a little R&R. Tomorrow’s a whole new day yo! Signing out from Starbucks City Hall at 10:59pm, jya ne~! *big grin*

P.S. There was this really vivid dream I had of something really interesting last night, it was virtually mind-boggling! Will talk more on that in my next post. Later~!